July 5, 2010

Calming Down....Ahhhhh

Now that my daughter's graduation is over, things are calming down a bit. We still have the task of her finding a job, and applying to community college, but those are less chaotic in my mind. Not to her, since she is now facing the "what are you doing for the rest of your life" glares from people. I am also going to be working more one on one with her, to prepare her to run a home of her own. With her going back to public school for high school, we didn't do as much as I would have liked over those years.

The boys are plugging away at school work, but it has been seriously hit or miss lately. I am waiting for Joe's evaluation letter from the school department, saying he is all set for this past year, and then we will drop at least 2 of the virtual classes. I seriously thought it would be a blessing for us, because of my shoulder and the need to take almost daily breaks...he would know what had to be done, and just jump in and do it. Unfortunately, Joe's brain doesn't work like that. History is his favorite subject, and he will spend an entire day on just that subject, letting his 3 other classes slide. I have to constantly be on him to budget his time better so that he can get all classes in each day. It also leaves us very little flexibility to do field trips or anything else, because he gets behind. So, I am working on a way to use the Abeka 7th grade Basic Math book we have. It is the teacher's edition, so I am trying to decide if I will just write his problems on the white board each day, or try to make up worksheets for him. Wish I could get my hands on the student workbook.

The garden is coming along nicely. It looks rather funny at the moment though. We have had near 100 temps for the last 3 days, and no sight of rain for a week. To protect the plants from burning, I took two large bed sheets and rigged them over the garden to keep the direct sunlight off the plants. I will get a picture tomorrow to show you :). At least it is bright and cheery, one red sheet, one purple lol.

My corn (about 10 plants) is almost a foot and a half tall, the two green beans that survived the transplanting are doing ok (one bean so far...yes you read that right...one...but it was GOOOOOD! LOL), and the new seeds I started are doing fabulous, nearly 5 inches tall in just 2 weeks. The tomato haven't sprouted yet, and may not due to getting them in the ground too late, but the grape tomato in the house is sprouting. Our carrot tops look fabulous, can't wait to see if I actually get a carrot bigger than a few inches...may not as the soil wasn't tilled down, but it will be interesting to see. The cukes are going great guns, and while I don't have any produce from them yet, it is only a matter of time, as 2 of the plants are flowering madly. The rest are just sprouting to about 3 inches.

I am still constantly online searching anywhere for enough land and a small home that we might be able to buy on contract when my SSDI comes through. I am seriously considering North Carolina, as I have family down there, so I wouldn't be totally surrounded by strangers. I would have a support system, emotionally. That is very important for me.

The reading and learning and trial and error continue on what we will be able to do once we do get on our homestead. I want to be as self sufficient as I can be, getting off all assistance, and maybe some day being able to get away from SSDI as well. I know it is a bit contradictory to say I want to be self-sufficient, meanwhile receiving SSDI, but until I can corral the resources and skills to support ourselves, it is the only option.

I am also spending tons of time learning more of Yah's word. I am doing a study called "It's Not What You Think, It's What You Do", from this site. I find myself struggling here and there with trusting HE will provide, especially when it comes to rent. I think I need to work much harder on this, as it is one of my biggest weaknesses. I tend to freak out periodically, which is not conducive to finding solutions, nor hearing Yah speak to me. I would be especially interested in a study of this particular area, if anyone knows of one, please show me the way :). I spend a great deal of time trying to hear Yah as I work through my days, and at night when the house is quiet. Something in my subconscious is blocking it, my fear of trusting I suspect. Not just trusting Yah, but trusting anyone. I have been burned so much in the past by others. It's something I NEED to get through though, otherwise I will never be a true daughter of HIS.

Ok, I am off to help my son figure out how to wear down a knot on the side of a piece of wood that he found at the beach. He wants to make it into something...not sure what yet.

Shalom!

4 comments:

  1. It is good to hear of your plan and know that you are settling in on a future. I sure understand about not trusting and feeling the pain of being wronged. Twice in my life I have been totally wiped out by 2 people I loved so much. They felt nothing in fact to this day they are still just skipping down the road. I moved on and made a life for myself and it is a good life. I still have trouble understanding the meanness of others toward me when I am nothing but kind. Baffles me. Makes me wonder if the Lord is coming soon. Do your best to take good care of yourself.

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  2. I agree with you it's better to be near people that can encourage you. North Carolina is beautiful. I hear it is great for homeschooling as well. I know the Lord will lead and guide you in all that you do. Have a blessed week

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  3. Your spirit and determination are so admirable. I know you'll succeed with your positive attitude.

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  4. Thank you ladies, for all the support and encouragement! It is such a blessing to me, I can never say thank you enough! :)

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