April 26, 2012

Homekeeping Day

I guess the last week has really worn me out...I went to bed at 7pm last night, and while I woke up twice, I went right back to sleep and didn't get up until 6am.  Eleven hours of sleep...wow!  It felt good though, except that when I sleep that long, my back is sore when I get up.  So, some motrin with the coffee, and I am getting ready to get busy.

On today's list:
-Last night's dinner dishes
-Laundry (this is never ending)
-Wash all floors
-Get the trash ready to go to the dump tomorrow
-Pick up my bedroom
-Sort through some stuff in the basement, packing up what will be kept, and getting the stuff that will go away ready for a trip to Goodwill this weekend.
-Reorganize some stuff in the garage w/the boy's help, to get the couches and such that my step daughter is taking soon, more towards the front. This gives me more room to stack our boxes that we will take when we move.

Not a bad day.  I am not going to kill myself, trying to get too much done in one day.  Just slow and steady.  I should make a really good dent in most of it.

Tomorrow we won't be home for a good chunk of the day.  I am going to go sit with dad, while my boys get outside at my mom's and help her get the front hill cleaned up.  Dad wants the leaves from last fall bagged up and brought up top, so that they can be run through the chipper and made into covering for the garden.  Hoping it only takes a few hours, but she has a lot that could really be done, so we will stay as long as needed.

We were blessed this week with lots of rain, and on and off, will continue every few days for the next week.  It was getting pretty scary there for awhile.  It was so dry, and lots of brush fires were breaking out.  I feel for the fire departments, they are mostly voluntary around here, so it's a bit of a job to get a fire down, especially if it is during the day when most of them are at work.  Thankfully, the rain has really done a number on the dryness, so less worry there. 

Well, not much else going on here.  Still trying to make a final decision about whether I am heading to NC as soon as my lease is up, or if I have to hang around here a bit more due to dad.  Hoping to be able to come to a decision by mid May at the latest.  I have to wait to see how he does with his confusion/dementia situation a few weeks out from the radiation and being taken off the second seizure med.  

My heart and head are telling me to go. Period.  My brothers are here.  But my younger brother is very much all about himself, and while he helps out some, it's just not the same if you know what I mean. And frankly, with his "I do more than anyone" attitude, and his selfishness generally, if I never saw him again, it wouldn't hurt my feelings.  I know that is harsh, but frankly I am sick of dealing with him.

Not one single word can pass off my lips, without him being either critical of it, or making fun of it.  Everything is about him.  And I have a very hard time sitting back watching him take advantage of my mother (but she allows it).  And I shouldn't let it hurt me, but my mother prefers my brothers over me, and always has, despite the fact that I am her daughter.  Can't change that.  Ahhh, nearly 46 years old and the family drama still hurts.  Frankly, I would so much like to get away from it, and just live my life.  Is that selfish?

Ok, enough belly aching.  Time to get dressed and get to work.  Have a super blessed day!

6 comments:

  1. But belly aching is so much fun sometimes.
    The stories I can tell about my brothers and sisters.
    I have even had my parents call me and "Tell" me what I can and can't say about them on my blog. LOL

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    1. LOL so true MDR :) Your parents sound like mine....None of my family reads my blog, so I am safe there, but my mother especially is a "peace" keeper to some extent, but definitely leans in favor of my brothers, especially the spoiled baby lol.

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  2. I don't think family drama ever ends- no matter what our age. You are in our prayers..my heart goes out to you.

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    1. Thank you, and sadly, I think you are right. I wish it did though.

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  3. My two cents worth? I think it's high time you went on with living your own life in just the way you want to do it! We can still love our parents/family but function and be happier not being in close proximity to them. It's just a fact of life. Remember, you don't have the ability to change anyone else, but you can change yourself. You've got your head on straight, Friend, and are heading toward a better life for yourself. Hugs!

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    Replies
    1. Thank you so much Mama Pea, I really needed to hear that today. You are such a blessing to me :) And to give that advice, as a momma yourself, means alot.

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